Oh my gosh I'm going to be in Texas in like 6 days! AH! A ninth of my mission is over and I'm headed to the real part and I'm scared. Estoy nerviosa para hablar espanol, y tambien no puedo predicar el evangelio!... Pues... yo puedo... pero a personas reales? No se!
Translation: I'm nervous to speak Spanish, and I can not preach the gospel ... Well ... I can ... but real people? No!
Translation: I'm nervous to speak Spanish, and I can not preach the gospel ... Well ... I can ... but real people? No!
Ok... So... remember how I told you that Poncho is going to get baptized? Well... my companion and I went in to teach him on Friday and he sneak attacked us! He was so upset and we asked him how he was doing and he told us about how his dad said that baptism was stupid and that he was really angry with his decision to join the church! Poncho's big thing has been feeling the love of God for him in his life and bringing his family unity. And so when this came up... he was so scared and didn't want to do anything to tear his family apart. We talked to him for a while... and I cried. Haha. I sat there in the middle of our lesson and cried because I knew how important this was for him! Not only that... I knew how hard this must be for him because he has such a strong desire to follow the will of the Lord and to come closer to his loving Father in Heaven. So... as I cried and told him a personal story and expressed love for him (all in spanish.. by the way) we asked him if we could come teach him the next day and help him with his problem. He said we could and we left devastated.
So... the next day we planned like CRAZY! We studied just for Poncho and we put a lesson together. We tried to follow the advice of Elder Bednar and focus only on the doctrine because the answer is ALWAYS in the doctrine. So... we did that and then we felt prompted to teach him about faith. When we went in to teach him... the spirit was SO powerful!! It was tangible in the room with us. Our lesson plan was truly inspired! (What is faith? Alma 32:21. How do we obtain faith? Helaman 5 - the end of the chapter where it talks about the lamanites praying to the voice until they have faith and the cloud of darkness is dispersed from them and they are filled with joy. Why do we need faith? Ether 12:12. That was it and it was marvelous!) After that lesson we got feedback from our teacher and he told us that it was one of the best lessons that he's ever been taught in the MTC or in the CCM (He taught at the MTC in Mexico for 2 years and he's taught here for 2 years as well). And I just received that confirmation that I do know how to be a missionary on some levels. I know how to love the people and pray for them and plan for their needs specifically. I know how to work so hard to do all I can to bring them closer to Christ. I know how to follow the spirit and know what the Lord wants his children to learn and know and do so that they can come closer to Him. I can be a missionary... in some ways. And I'm nowhere near anywhere close to having it all down... but the Lord is guiding me every step of the way. I really just want more than anything to be His window and I feel like with that lesson with Poncho... My companion and I were that window. The Lord taught Him the importance of having faith in him and taking that step into the darkness before he can light the path ahead.
Hmmmm... what else happened. I had a one-on-one interview with my teacher today which gave me a little bit of confidence in my abilities. I've been freaking out a little bit the past few days because I'm just sooo overwhelmed! There's sooo much to do to get ready and it's crazy! So... I talked to my teacher about it and asked him what I need to do to not lose that love for the people but also to get everything done and basically he told me to quit relying on my own strength. We talked about my progress here in the MTC with the language... he told me that in just 8 weeks my spanish is now on an 85 on a scale of 100 and how that is COMPLETELY impossible to do without the Lord doing it for me. Which is SOOO true! I really couldn't be working this hard, I couldn't be this happy, I couldn't be learning so quickly, I couldn't be doing ANY of this without the Lord. I don't know why I think and worry so much about my own strength and my own efforts and my own capabilities all the time! Nothing I say or do on my own matters! The ONLY thing that is important is my Heavenly Father, My Savior and EVERYTHING they do for me. I can't do any of it on my own! I feel so incredibly blessed! So blessed! I love my Savior and I'm so grateful for everything he does for me, everything he has done for me, and everything he will do for me. Without Him... we are all nothing. It is ONLY because of his works and his efforts that we really are worth anything in this life.
I love you all! And keep working hard! Come closer to your Savior! If you don't own a copy of Preach My Gospel... buy one! Buy it and study it with your scriptures! It's not just for missionaries! It's for every member of the church!
Love you! And I love hearing from you! Hopefully I'll have more time to email in the field NEXT WEEK! AHH!
Phrase not to say: El evagelio ha bendito mi vida. (The gospel has sold my life... hahah! Learned that one the hard way) The phrase to say and the phrase I was trying to say was: El evangelio ha benecido mi vida. (the gospel has blessed my life... big difference there!) Hahaha... had a good laugh about that one... for a few days.phrase not to say: El evagelio ha bendito mi vida. (The gospel has sold my life... hahah! Learned that one the hard way) The phrase to say and the phrase I was trying to say was: El evangelio ha benecido mi vida. (the gospel has blessed my life... big difference there!) Hahaha... had a good laugh about that one... for a few days.
Hermana Lauren Jones
